Dear Andre, We're Officially Gay for You

For a guy that pretty much gets worked in every trade he makes, Ned Colletti still gets a pass for the one deal in which he clearly won. Ned we forgive you for Lance Carter, Danys Baez and Julio Lugo. Well, not really. Those trades were colossally dopey, even for Ned. The fact that the Dodgers were able to get anything for Milton Bradley when the whole world knew he had to go is amazing. But Andre Ethier? He was a known commodity, an outfielder with tremendous upside.

Manny Ramirez is arguably the best right-handed hitter of his generation, and Matt Kemp is one of the most talented players to don the blue in recent memory. But there's something about Ethier. Those other guys are so good that they make it seem too easy. Ethier gives off the vibe that he is getting everything out of his ability. Maybe its the streakiness, the slumps? Do his struggles make his successes that much more savory? We don't like to get all "heart and soul" with it, but with apologies to all you Russell Martin fans - Ethier is it. Don't give us the numbers. We'll do it like Plaschke, with our eyes and superior reasoning. Ladies and gentlemen (ladies?) your 2009 Los Angeles Dodgers MVP, Andre Ethier.

You're Welcome

Of course we were aware that when we posted a genius brief about Russel Martin's two seasons of suckitude, he would immediately go off. That's how much we love the Dodgers. We'll fuck with a guy just to see how he'll respond. We even drizzled our brilliance on the comments over at kensai's place based on the highly unlikely event that Martin isn't checking this site on an hourly basis. So the bar is set. For the remainder of the season Russell Martin needs to hit a four-run home run every night to escape our considerable fury. Now if you'll excuse us we have a goat to slaughter as a sacrifice to whatever deity is angry at James Loney's bat.

And He Makes Errors Too!

We know that it is sacrilege to disparage future Hall of Fame catcher Russell Martin, after all he is a gamer. But let's face it Martin has been a huge disappointment for the Dodgers. Notwithstanding his critical error that cost the Dodger's last night's game, he simply is not that special. He has completely lost any ability to hit the ball over the fence. He draws the occasional walk and on rare occasions a base hit, but it's time to admit it - he is just another light hitting catcher. You know, the kind that plays for every other team in the league.

Let the Danny Ardoin drum beat begin.

How About Pierre for Pujols?

Bill Shaikin's proposed trade for Roy Halladay is doubtlessly a pipe dream, although we'd pull the trigger in a heart beat (heartbeat?). What's interesting here is that someone in the Los Angeles media will actually broach the topic of trading Russell Martin. We all know how those dudes at the LA Times get all misty eyed when it comes to heart-and-soul, dick-in-the-dirt types of guys like Martin. Bill Plaschke still gets all weepy when the ghost of Paul LoDuca haunts his column. After all, how dumb was it to trade a decent catcher due a big payday and a statistical decline for a front of the rotation starting pitcher? How soon we forget, LoDuca hustled!

So here the Dodgers sit wondering what it would take to make a serious run at Roy Halladay. The name Clayton Kershaw gets bandied about often, probably by J.P. Ricciardi. But trading your second best starter for your first best starter seems like a weak net result when the bottom line is a World Series. And let's be clear, the Dodgers don't have a GM with the sack to do a big deal like this. This package might not get you a Halladay, but would it get you Jake Peavy? It definitely won't get you Cliff Lee. The Indians are pretty stocked at catcher (thanks in part to our boy Ned.) All this trade discussion is pointless anyway. We'll sum it up with this: if a starting pitcher could be had for the scant price of a league average catcher, you do it. Even if he hustles.